Adamsky Law Offices Blog

It's clearly Spring around here.  On the way to work this morning I saw several groups of Turkeys.  In each group there was at least one male presenting his tail for the females.  This looks like the classic picture you see of a Turkey around Thanksgiving with his big tail unfurled like a peacock.  But, you won't see that in November, it is courting behavior used in the Spring to find a mate.  Imagine if we humans had some sort of mating system like that.  The males puff themselves up, furl out their tails and strut around waiting for a female to find them attractive ... that would be something  ... oh, wait! Three Turkeys at my Bird Feeder - April 2011 (C) Edward Adamsky, 2011

I have often written about dealing with dementia patients. They do not react like people whose brains are functioning normally. About 5-10% of dimentia patients exhibit violent behavior. The cause of the violent behavior may not be known and it can come from any number of triggers (or nothing). Dealing with a violent family member can be difficult.  Here are some tips: 1.Back down . If your loved-one gets angry because he doesn’t want to take a shower, drop it and try again later when his mood has improved. 2.Apologize , even if it’s not your fault. This will buy you time and good will. 3.Change the topic . Stay calm and change the subject to something your loved-one usually enjoys. 4.Remember the world is distorted for those with Dementia . They are sensitive to noise and become fatigued easily.  What is going on around them may not make sense as their brain cannot comprehend or remember context. 5.Call for help . For emergencies, call 911. For non-emergen...

The New York Times recently posted the article linked below about dementia. I have been discussing this with my clients for years. You cannot usually engage in a logical argument with a one-year old child, and sometimes you cannot do so with an elder who has advanced dementia. You must deal with the disease of the mind in a way that works for that person. The first time I heard of this issue was from a nurse at a nursing home. She said sometimes you just have to lie to someone, but she didn't call it a "lie" she said most of the time the "lies" were not big enough to even be called a "fib" this nurse called it a "fiblet." That is a little white-lie that helps to calm and redirect the patient so she is not upset by the issue. You probably don't want to keep telling someone that her loved-one has died, but you might want to tell her that lunch will arive "soon" even though she just ate. I faced this issue personally with my gr...

NATIONAL TAKE BACK INITIATIVE PELHAM POLICE DEPARTMENT - COMMUNITY ROOM APRIL 30, 2011 10:00 AM - 2:00 PM The "Take Back" initiative addresses a public safety and health issue. More than seven million Americans currently abuse prescription drugs, according to the 2009 Substance Abuse and Mental Health Administration’s National Survey on Drug Use and Health. Each day, approximately, 2,500 teens use prescription drugs to get high for the first time according to the Partnership for a Drug Free America. Studies show that a majority of abused prescription drugs are obtained from family and friends, including the home medicine cabinet. In an effort to address this problem, DEA, in conjunction with state and local law enforcement agencies conducts National Take Back Day to provide a venue for persons who wanted to dispose of unwanted and unused prescription drugs. At the last event in September, the American Public turned in more than 121 tons of pills. DEA has scheduled the second ...

Whenever you give someone more than the annual (yearly) exemption amount, you are supposed to file a gift-tax return. There is a tax on the givers of gifts. Or course, there is a lifetime exemption of $5 million so until you give more than that, you won't owe any tax (it used to be $1 million and could revert back to that if Congress lets it happen in 2013). But, you still have to file a return if you give someone more than $13,000 in any one year. Most people don't make large gifts, so they don't have to worry about gift-tax returns. But many people do give away their home or land (or add their child's name to the deed as a co-owner). If you put your home in joint ownership with your child, you effectively gave that child half of the value of your home. Unless your home is pretty small it's probably worth more than $26,000, so you should file a gift-tax return. Now, the IRS is cracking down on this issue. They have targeted several states and demanded that the stat...

Who should get the old dining room table that came from Grandma’s house? Who should get mom’s diamond ring? What about those Civil War relics from Grandpa’s side of the family? What about the family photos? Dividing up family heirlooms can be a touchy subject. If you leave the decision until after you die, your children may end up fighting over simple personal possessions. Most of the Wills I write for clients say to split the assets equally among the children. That will be easy for the cash, stocks and bonds, but not so easy for the stuff. In many families, the actual division is handled by the children, and done with fairness. In other families, the little things cause no end of trouble. Years of bitter feelings can come from the thoughtless actions of one child after the parents are gone. To avoid these problems, you should plan ahead and talk things over with your family. By bringing children and others in to the conversation, you can make things easier for them later. Children ne...

My wife and I recently took a Winter vacation and went to the Christmas Farm Inn in Jackson, New Hampshire. We had a great time. The Inn was very nice as were the new managers. The food was good, the room was very nice, and the spa was wonderful. It was very snowy up north and Jackson looked like a winter wonderland. At night it was all lit up with lights. Nearby Nestlenook Farm was very pretty. We didn't go there, but heard it is a nice place too. There is much more than I thought there was up in the White Mountain region of New Hampshire. We found great restaurants and fantastic shopping in N. Conway. But, the best part was the peace and quiet, the wonderful outdoors with mountain views, and snowy vistas, and of course the time alone with my wife. http://www.christmasfarminn.com